Out the Backside

It’s that time of year again when what seems like everyone converges to the TPC course in Scottsdale for the biggest show on turf. In the seven plus years I’ve attended, I think I’ve watched an aggregate total of 4 1/2 holes of golf. Does anyone watch the golf? There’s too much free beer and food to be worried about how Lefty choked on 16. Plus with all the cougars running around showing off the new set of bolt-ons from the divorce settlement, golf is more of the distraction. I enjoy watching my single friends swing for the fence and strike out relentlessly… mostly because they don’t make $200K and drvie a Porsche. All in all this is a big excuse for a grand social event in Phoenix and about the only time of year when it’s not too hot. Makes you wonder what a real tournament is like such as the Masters. Bet that’s a huge party.

I bet I’ve spent 20 hours the past couple weeks sorting through all of the files I’ve neglected since 2003. The move from the Knox house to the Bighorn house really started this filing snowball effect. It was exciting when I discovered the missing 2001 tax return paperwork and all my paycheck stubs since before I graduated college. That was the heaviest recycling dumpster I’ve rolled out since TO’s going away party. It was less embarrassing since it was only paper and not all beer and booze bottles. I always wonder what my neighbors think when it sounds like a freight train full of beer bottles rolling down my driveway at 10PM on Tuesday night.

Working out really isn’t all that fun. More of a necessity, similar to breathing and dropping a duce. Something I have to do since I’m not getting any younger. You know what else sucks? Eating less food and on top of that…. eating healthy food. What a crock. Anyone that says they can eat tuna on soy crackers and like it is full of crap. Can I have more plain chicken breast and veggies please?? Whatever. Drinking less is another thing thats supposed to be healthy for you. I always figured if I could keep the right mix my blood would never get thick enough to have a heart attack. So much for that. I’ve toned it down to a drink a night… during the week. We’ll see what the weekend brings. Poker on Saturday, I’m not making any guarantees.

I know what you may be thinking with a subject line of Blowout coming from me, but it’s not what you expect. Tressel and his band of toothless wonders from The O. State U were mopped up and down the field last night. 80 yards of total offense?? This from a Heisman winning field general? As much as it was bad for the Big 10, it felt damn good inside watching them crumble. Another season of CFB has ended… guess I’ll start working out and exercising more.

What better use of a leftover holiday gourd than to carve it for entertaining purposes. I believe you will start to see this phenomon in Europe in late O7 and possibly Japan in 08. Here is Rich showing his carving skills. Notice the meticulous use of the carrot peeler…